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Questions Answered by either me or previously by another guide:

Question 1.) Are you a Marshmallow?
Answer: ...Yes.

Question 2.) I want a pony, but my parents told me no! What should I do?
Answer: I would say if a tantrum didn't work, you should move out of your parent's basement that you've been living in for 40 years.

Question 3.) What would happen if the earth flew into the sun?
Answer: You would die a fiery death.

Question 4.) I'm from Kansas but now I'm a millionaire.
Answer: Wow, that's amazing! Thanks for making me realize how bad my life is. Can I Answer any questions for you today?

Question 5.) What is your last name?
Answer: My last name is Tennant...as in David. How can my dashing good looks and I help you today?

Question 6.) I hate you.
Answer: They told me at the blood bank this might happen...

Question 7.) Do you think aliens, ghosts or zombies are real?
Answer: I think it's very likely that aliens exist. It's possible that ghosts exist, and zombies can't exist if I'm going to go to sleep tonight.

Question 8.) How can I make my head explode?
Answer: You could put C4 or a stick of dynamite in your mouth. That said, I wouldn't recommend making your head explode.

Question 9.) I have 1 tube sock, 4 rubber bands, a broken egg, a piece of paper and a Frank Sinatra CD...Explain to me how I can get to the moon with these.
Answer: You could wrap the rubber bands around the egg, put it in the tube sock, wrap the Frank Sinatra CD in the paper...and then become an astronaut.

Question 10.) Who will Kimberly marry?
Answer: Kimberly will marry a man named François from Paris, France. Kudos to Kimberly.

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Questions so dumb that the only proper Answer: sent was '...what?'

Question 1.) Is this Adam West?
Answer: I wanted to give: Yes, this is The Batman. How can I help you today?

Question 2.) Do they make popsicles for dogs?

Question 3.) If we are related by marriage will our children have defects?
Answer: I wanted to give: Yes, I would guess YOUR children will have birth defects...but not because you are related by marriage.

Question 4.) What will happen to the village people at the bottom of the cone when I eat it?

Question 5.) Who would win in a fight? A badger or a beaver...but the beaver had a gun.

Question 6.) Do you need to go to grad school to become a CIA agent?

Question 7.) How many calories does a 5'6'' 140lb male burn from watching tv for 15 minutes?

Question 8.) How hard would one have to push a little kid, weighing 75 lbs, with a shuffleboard pusher in order to shove him across the length of a shuffleboard court in order to vacate the shuffleboard court for use by older people who know what they are doing?

Question 9.) How many Grey squirrels standing on each other's shoulders does it take to reach the moon?

Question 10.) Will the greenhouse effect add mass to cocaine in a ziploc bag?
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More to come after my next shift, I'm sure...

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